Puppy love!

His eyes continue to gleam before me. I can still sense the thud as I enter the compound. His excitement brought a cheer on my face. And all he craved for was a pat on his head. His unconditional love can never be replaced. Now, it is all a distant memory.

Love is strange. On the one hand, it is something that triggers certain needs. While on the other, it is a feeling without which the mere existence of a living being is incomplete. There are so many kinds of love. In fact, each society defines love in a different manner. And as 'intelligent' living beings, we abide by the societal norms, almost blindly, and accept the many theories of an emotion so complex without even the slightest desire to question or discover the not so obvious.

The fact is, human beings are a sack full of expectations. No matter how simple a person many be, he is bound to have desires that cannot always be fulfilled. If we are promised the universe, we expect the universe to grant us power imagination. If we are given all the love in the world, we dream about being the only person worth loving.

It wasn't until I became friends with man's faithful canine, did I realise the true meaning of love. Bolt was a Labrador. It was so full of life. I would wake up to his bark or seeing his little head stuck between two railings on the terrace. That was how he chose to greet us.

His eyes said it all. Anything naughty or nice, the gleam caught our attention. And I would stand in absolute awe.

Bold died really young. But yet, I still feel his presence. Every time I opened the gates, I could still hear his bark echoing in my head.  His soft, white fur always drew me to pat it, while his eyes depicted affection, care and love. There was never a day when I felt upset after having pat him. His excitement and sheer desire to be with me, even after a hard time at work, always made me feel blessed and worthy of being myself.

I still remember how he stood on the boundary wall, with his paws resting on the wall, waiting for me to pat him. Bidding adieu was never this hard. I would have to force myself to step away and beg him to head back to his kennel.

His death was more than just a loss of another affectionate living being. It was as if, a part of our lives had just been snatched away after nature decided to act its way. Funny, but that affection, love and trust could never be replaced, explained or understood. And yet, it was accepted.

Relationships are strange. Many a time, it is our desire for company, the special someone that pushes us to strike a conversation with people whom we barely know. It is funny how sometimes our greatest friends are those who we met at an essay contest or even on the train. Or in my case, a four legged canine.

What is more fascinating, is that sometimes those bonds become more powerful, unique and special. Nobody knows why or how people choose to let their guard down and get close to some. We will never know why and how we feel lonely without that stranger beside us.

 Love - in its true sense, is unconditional. It is an emotion that motivates you to fight each day. It is that feeling that makes you feel alive and grateful every second.

It was Bolt who taught me what love was. Nobody will ever be able to explain how Bolt could dare to be affectionate even after having spent precious little time with him. And now, his absence does make us feel incomplete in some way.

Perhaps that is what love is all about. Perhaps, that is why, letting go is never easy.

That is what they want!

Okay. I admit that my limited knowledge of the media has led to terrible rifts with  the world around me. But yet, I do not seem to stop questioning the most strange yet accepted approaches in the field.

An area that often contradicts one's thoughts could be the way in which content is presented before the public. Be it television, radio or even online, there is no formula to the ideal representation of information to the audience. To begin with, many in the industry fail to define their audience which does lead to a lot of chaos and confusion.

As a viewer I am puzzled by the rather obscure depiction of various content in advertisements, cinema and even television shows. How does the media know what we want? Is it that audiences of the 21st century are uninterested in good yet innovative work? Or do the big-daddies of media still believe that the age old formula or drama, masala and 'modernity' is still the only solution to a successful business? On the one hand, we curse the media for exaggerating certain topics. While on the other, media schools encourage students to conduct further research so as to understand the market and of course the mind-set of the audience.

Entertainment TV in India is perhaps a wonderful example that clearly explains the varied moods of the Indian media. From flooding its screens with soaps, many channels have now resorted to reality shows. No offence, but an over doze of the same formula can bore you to death! It has become next to impossible to consider other forms of entertainment solely as we have tuned our audiences to watch the various versions of the famous the saas- bahu hungama!. Ah! Yes, then there are the celebrity or film shows that many claim to excite people. Let us be realistic. The first of its kind will always have a charm of its own. But you can't guarantee that a similar show with 'major'modifications will bring you the desired viewership.

Whatever happened to creativity? Who dares to think out of the box? Why are ideas being ignored in the name of competition? Why must me follow the others?

Interestingly, even television news seems to have adapted the same formula and has become (if I must say so) more entertaining than soaps. Death, rape, corruption and everything that is not nice has suddenly taken over the screens. Nobody truly values NEWS, FACTS or even INFORMATION. It is all about the number of eye-balls one can grab in 30 minutes. Our anchors scream at the top of their voices, making a situation sound tense and life threatening, while in reality there is nothing immensely dangerous that could take place. Nobody raise questions. Instead, they continue to state the obvious in as many vocal variations. All of a sudden, news is not about digging deeper. But it is about the how effectively you can raise the TRP of your channel and perhaps become no.1 in the business.

I think it is high time we accept that the media is not only about latest fashion trends, the stars or even the glamour. It took many great minds to make it what it is today. And as future members of the media, we must strive towards keeping their dreams alive. And bring out something unique, special and memorable every second. Gone are the days when fashion ruled the screens. With youtube or even  It would not be long before mobile applications or even laptops would replace television sets. We have to dare to be different. We have to dare to stand out. Most of all we must dare to make a mark at each stage.

So gear up for a more competitive and happening experience in the media!!

It is about living life King Size...

They say things happen when least expected. For years, I detested all those who uttered the cliche`. Until one day, the most of strange thing happened. Something that changed me in every sense. From being the lost, confused, and angry person I have now begun to feel proud of being 'me.' 
     It was yet, another day off from the hectic life of journalist. I was extremely upset after a massive argument with a former batchmate from college over an issue that had been lingering in my head for months. At the end of the argument, I was miserable and yearned to be dettached from the rest of the world. Inspite of making an attempt to talk it out with a few friends, I was unable to get our depression and my terrible state of mind. Until Brijesh called and had asked me for directions to my residence.
    Forgive me for not introducing you the protagonist of this tale. Brijesh, an engineer from Bangalore, is not only a 'geek' but is a party-animal beyond imagination. A friend of a friend, this 24 year old was unique in his approach to life. Sure, he has problems which he does not dare discuss. But it was his live life King Size that caught my attention. Hailing from the quiet little town of Kollam, Kerala, Brijesh is perhaps those few men, who not believes in certain values, but has tried his hand at many things. Be it smoking, drinking (which he relishes even today), long bike rides with no safety gear etc. 'Just the person I needed to talk to,' I thought as he approached the entrance of my building.
   Like most of my days off, I decided to meet up with a few friends. And as luck would have wanted, I met Brijesh and we spent alot of time together roaming around the city of Mumbai. At first I was sad, for my feared my friend would have to deal with a rather moody person after his hectic day at work. Strangely, he seemed extremely happy to go around the gullies of Dadar inspite of shirt soaked in perspiration. After a rather long walk, the two of us decided to enjoy the air-conditoned premises of a coffee shop. Brijesh then granted me permission to speak my heart out and thus, for the next 3 hours, he was witness to a rather embarrasing sight of verbal diarrohea. I began talking to him about the fight with my batchmate, the lousy world of corruption, how chocolate makes me hyperactive etc. I confess, he was forced to listen to me, though he did voice his opions from time to time.
  After roaming around Mumbai for nearly 4 hours, Brijesh dared to ask me some rather shocking questions. 'Do you like yourself? Must you always need somebody to appreciate you?' he asked. I was astound. 'Not another fight, and stop complaining session,' I thought. 'Yes, I do like myself. But it just feels nice to listen to a compliment when you do something nice' I said. It was not long before we began talking about the importance of loving oneself. Brijesh replied-'I know it does hurt to know that you are never made to feel good about everything you do. And it does boost one's morale when you are complimented. But have you ever considered doing something for yourself? Be it dressing up in an attire you would have never adorned? Or probably going to be club and dancing till your feet become numb? You must do it. Who cares about the world? You have every right to do all that you would like to the way you want to.' Brijesh was not the only person to have told me about it. Many others have, including my brothers. But I guess in most occasions I had ruled out the option of listening to someone else's opinion. At that moment, it felt as if Brijesh had read my mind. It was not long before I began telling him about greatest desire to ride a bike or drive my own car across the borders of a state. All of a sudden I realised that it was my fear strange fear of the world that held me back. There were stories to tell. My life had no adventures, no excitement. Each time I was hurt, I felt alone for I never dared to try new things. 'I have never been to pub,' I told Brijesh. He smirked and then chose to ignore my comment. 'Sometime later,' he said. Honestly, it was this comment that has ensured that I never stop smiling. For I actually dared to spill out my heart's tiniest desire. 'Sure I do not drink. But one must know what such places feel like. After all, Mumbai is a free city,' I thought to myself.
    As he escorted me back to my residence, he told me to never hesitate being myself even if it meant being my childish. So long as you are happy there is nothing that can stop you from doing or being what you are.
   Ever since that very day, I no longer regret my past. I no longer hold any grudges towards those whom I considered unfair and dishonest. All of a sudden I felt confident about who I am. People often accused of me of being immature, child-like and unreasonable. While some others said my child-like quality was what they appreciate the most in me. All of a sudden I felt like dancing in the middle of the street(yes, the bollywood fever is contangious!). After all these days, I no longer feared CHANGE.
   Sometimes change can be as scary as falling off a cliff. The thought of doing something unusual, unknown of the many consequences is bound make one feel hollow and doubtful about themselves. We are all raised to believe in the concepts of black and white. Although we talk of the grey areas of life, many a time we forget about them are often alternate between the modern and traditional approaches of life. Perhaps that is why we often witness or are victims of the world of the judgemental.
   Then again Change is constant and there is precious little wean do about that. The challenge is however, to adapt to the world around us. And continue to cherish every moment we live. I guess, it is time for me to grab my gear and head to muddy terrians and experience those bumpy rides and smile about the bodyache :).

And I thought she would be there always..

It has only been 9 months. Yet, I have begun to experience the big bad world like nobody else.

The transition from that of a student to a working woman is tricky. While on the one hand you are financially independent, on the other you lack the maturity and sensibility of a responsible human being. It takes alot to be oneself amidst high pressure and competition.Many a time, you are denied that joy of being simple and kind to those you care for. Atleast, that is what I have experienced.

A friend, teacher and colleague. She was my only source of relief at work. We would talk of good old days, about work and of movies. Both of us enjoyed a typical South-Indian meal and were willing to go to any extent to satisfy our craving for a Rasam and Rice.Things seemed too perfect.

But now, it all seems to be a dream. From a friend to the most hated human being in the office. She no longer feels comfortable around me. I am her primary source of trouble and she will continue to endorse it. Only because she believes that a few complaints an earn her the 'respect' and the progress she desires. She never misses an opporunity to insult, criticise or blame me for any fautl even if it isn't mine. Yet, I remain silent and try to remind myself of those good times.

Though I am tempted to scream and create havoc, I choose not to. For I still admire her as the teacher who taught me all that I needed to know. May be it is the times that compels one to lose his/her identity only to emerge as the survivor. The question is - Does being a survivor give you right to deny others of surviving?

For happiness knows no rules!

Another day off. But this time, I had plans. Thus, I chose to wake up as early as I could to complete the week's chores and set off towards my favourite part of the city of dreams- Colaba. Unlike the usual rendevouz, I had to visit a relative to collect an essential document. Nonetheless, the walk down the streets, surrounded by buildings of the British Era were soothing to the soul. My relative was kind to have treated me to a Mc Donalds outlet near his office. I believe he had sensed my dire need for company. We spoke about a wide variety topics, from education to family, from media to media law. At half past 12 I decided to catch the next train towards my side of town, in order to meet a few friends at the Grand Hyatt, Santa Cruz. Thus, began my moments of hope, joy and comfort.

These were no ordinary friends or the typical 'we are always there for you' variety. They were my long lost family.A family that only the Asian College of Journalism can assure you. For over a year, I would bend the rules, talk tough, do the craziest things only becaue I had them beside me. As time went by, each of us split ways. And now, though some of us are in the same city, we rarely do things the family way. It was amazing to have exchanged hugs, stories of college; the rumours, the jokes and most of all the warmth.

For over 4 hours, I laughed to my hearts' content. I continued to mock one of them for their terrible judgement of speed, distance and time, watched two beautiful women laugh at everyone of my silly jokes, and mocked another for his meaningless anxiety.

Some of us experience hardships for a long time; either with each other or with the world around us. But those precious 6 hours, had made me feel hopeful for the days to come. It was as if a part of me had been revived for I now knew where I belong. The joy of having my family beside me was indeed priceless.

Change is inevitable. But an honest friendship remains evergreen no matter how strange or drastic the change may be. It is this love/affection/warmth that often keeps us going. I only hope that we continue to relive those moments from time to time. Lest we forget about the most precious thing that we deserve- happiness.

Cheers to those who have made my life complete, memorable, and have given me the support I needed at many occassions.